Taming the Tongue – Hasty Words

2 December 07

1. Introduction:

· James 3:2-8  -  “The tongue is a fire..”

· Our words and speech are containers – they release death or life wherever we direct them.

· People ‘hear’ the words but are ‘impacted’ by the spirit they are spoken in.

· Our body, soul and spirit are all impacted by spoken words.

· Previously:  Lying words, Gossip, Put Down words, Empty words.

· Today:  “Hasty Words” – “I wish I had never said that!”

· Hasty = irritated, impatient, thoughtless, rash, done quickly without thought of impact.

· Proverbs 29:20  -  “Do you see a man hasty in his words?  There is more hope for a fool that him”.

2. Hasty Words Have Bad Consequences:

• Proverbs 14:17 – “A quick tempered man acts foolishly”.
• Proverbs 14:29  -  “He that is slow to wrath has great understanding but he that is hasty of spirit exalts folly”.
• When people are angry – they are prone to speak and act foolishly.
• When people are angry – then their IQ drops – no longer think through the consequences.
• E.g. Psalm 106:32-33  -  Moses got angry with Israel and spoke and acted foolishly.

Moses’s hasty words and actions cost him his leadership opportunity.

• E.g. 2 Chronicles 26:18-19  -  Uzziah became very angry when his goal was blocked.

His failure to respond properly cost him his physical health.

• Ecclesiastes 7:9  -  “Do not hasten in your spirit to be angry, for anger rests in the heart of fools”.

3.  Unresolved Anger Opens the Door to Demons:

· Ephesians 4:26-27  -  “Be angry but do not sin, do not let the sun go down on your anger, neither give place to the devil”.

- anger is a strong emotion – It is ok to feel angry.

- Anger that is not resolved properly leads to sin.

- Anger needs to be dealt with the same day – before going to sleep.

- Anger unresolved will create a door for demons.

· Proverbs 25:28  -  “He that has no rule over his own spirit is like a city broken down”.

· Genesis 4:4-8  -  Cain was very angry and his fell.

 -  Cain rose up against Abel his brother and killed him.

· Cain had strong unresolved feelings of anger.

· Cain was warned that sin would come as a result of unresolved anger.

· Proverbs 29:22  -  “an angry man stirs up strive and a furious man abounds in transgression (to rebel and react”).  

· Anger = strong violent feelings  of reaction at some perceived injustice.

· Anger has various levels of intensity.

i) Resentment:

· Smouldering, brooding on injustice.

                = often appears as a dark scowl on face, moodiness, sulking.

ii) Wrath:

· Anger that seeks revenge or punishment – lashes out to hurt or wound.

iii) Rage:

· Intense explosive reaction, destructive expressions.

· Examples: Tantrums, shouting, stomp feet, slam door, yell, phone hung up.

                         Throw things, break things, hissy fit”, hit things, bad tempered.

· Response:  People tend to “accept it” …. “Just me” (minimize it)

                          People tend to “excuse it” …. “Not my fault, can’t help it”.

                          People tend to “deny” ….”I am not angry”.

4.  Unrestrained Anger releases a Spirit of Murder and Death:

• Matthew 5:21-27  -  “Whoever is angry with his brother is a murderer”.
• Old Testament standard for living – “Thou shalt not murder…”
• The intent of the law is that we live under the law of love.
• New Testament standard of living – “Anger is a root from which murder flows”.
• Wrath =  anger that seeks revenge, punishment, retaliation, lashes out and seeks to hurt or wound”.
• How many murders was the result of anger?
• Explosive anger => hate => murder  -  1 John 3:15
• Unresolved anger opens a door to judgment in the spirit world against us.

The Root of Anger:

• Anger arises when we feel our “personal rights have been violated”.

i)  Blocked Goal       - I have a right to get my way, what I want.

ii) Badly Treated       - I have a right to be treated fairly.

iii) Injustice                 - I have a right to just treatment.

           When anger is out of proportion to the event there is probably many

           unresolved ‘injustices” that have accumulated.

5. How to Handle your Anger:

· The example of Jesus:

- 1 Peter 2:21-23  -  He committed himself to him who judges right.

- 1 Peter 4:19  -  commit your souls to Him in doing good.

· Key issue is one of ownership and personal rights.

· Practical:

1)  Admit the feelings                              2)  Create space to process

3)  Let – energy out constructively                   4)  Ask the Holy Spirit to reveal root

5)  Surrender rights to God                     6)  Look for constructive ways to

                                                                         Address issues – Do Good!

6. How to Handle Angry People:

· Don’t feed of their anger or react to it.

i) Speak quietly, touch arm.

Proverbs 15:1

            Ecclesiastes 10:4 

ii)  Ask questions to understand the person.

James 1:19

iii) Withdraw – boundary abusive controlling behaviour.

iv) Confront at appropriate time to obtain changes in the behaviour.