·         Rev. 4:11  - We are created to bring pleasure, enjoyment to God.

·         Man - only creation of God capable of intimate relationship with Him.

·         Desire of God is for relationship, friendship, intimacy.

·         That desire is built into every human being - desire for friendship, intimacy.

·         Jn. 17:3  - This is eternal life that they know thee and the one you have sent.  Know - 1097 = Experiential knowledge.   Eternal life is a consequence of an intimate relationship with the source of life.

·         Relationship with God differs from any other relationship.

i)      God is a spirit (Jn. 2:24)

ii)     God is great (Is 57:15)

·         Can only know God if he reveals himself.

·         God reveals himself to all who are hungry for relationship  with him.

·         Matt 16:17 - Blessed are you - my Father has revealed it to you.

·         Can know about God - but not know him personally.

·         To know God personally He must reveal himself.





·         Relationships develop through stages = know about - know personally - friendship


a)    To know God personally must come on terms God sets.

·         Jn. 1:12  To as many as received (Christ) he gave power to become children.

·         Foundation for relationship with God is faith in Christ and the work he did on the Cross.

·         Jn. 2:23-25 - Believed because of miracles - no depth of relationship.


b)    To become a friend of God - must fulfil the conditions He sets.

·         Mt. 11:19 - Friend of publicans and sinners.

·         Jesus was friendly to publicans and sinners but called few his friends.

·         To become a friend of God requires we meet the conditions He sets.

·         Jn.15:14-15  You are my friends if you do whatsoever I command you.

·         Spirit of obedience is essential to friendship with Christ = Faith

·         Must have a respect for him that results in heart obedience.

E.g development of child to adult.

·         Goal of the development is friendship

·         Stages of the development = child - teen - adult

·         Key issues:  obedience/respect - responsibility/faith - Friendship

·         Friendship becomes familiarity unless the conditions are met.

·         Jesus disciples grew to point of friendship with Him.

·         Mt. 28:18-20  Great commission = train people to point of friendship with God.

·         Benefits of friendship is that God reveals his heart, his secrets.

·         God does not reveal his heart to casual acquaintances.



·         Ps. 25:14 The secret of the Lord is with those that fear Him.

·         Secret = People in close discussion, intimacy, sharing personal things.




·         E.g.  Abraham:  Called the friend of God  = Is. 41:6  Abraham my friend/ 2 Chron. 20:7 Abraham your friend

·         Ja. 2:21-23  Abraham faith - obedience - called friend of God!

·         Abraham withhold nothing from God - God was first in his affection

·         Gen.22:12 Fear God, not withheld son, only son whom you love.

·         Abraham had deep respect and fear of God and obeyed Him and put Him first.

·         Gen. 18:12  Shall I hide from Abraham that thing which I do.

·         God revealed what about to do - Abraham able to forsee judgement to come and intercede with God for release of Lot and family.  

·         Lot: Righteous man with totally compromised life. (2 Pet. 2:8)

·         Ja. 4:4 - Friendship with world is enmity with God.  Whoever will be friend of the world is the enemy of God.

Enemy = 2190 = to hate, to be hostile, to be an adversary especially Satan.

Friend = 5384 = To be fond of and associate with.

Friendship with God is compromise by friendship with world.


·         E.g. Moses:  Called the friend of God. (Exod. 33:11)

·         Ps. 103:7  - He made known ways to Moses, acts to people of Israel.

·         Israel saw acts - what God did, miracles.

·         Heart motive in serving God - “what can I get out of it?”

·         cf  Prov. 19:6  Every man is a friend to him that gives gifts.  All brethren of poor hate him - his friends go far from him.  He pursues them with words but they are wanting to him.

·         Prov. 17:17  A Friend loves at all times.

·         When serving God seemed to disadvantage Israel they complained.  Num. 14:1-3  Were it not better for us to return to Egypt.

·         People who do not know heart of God and the character of God, misinterpret difficulties and hardships as signs that God is against them.

·         Moses walked in obedience - paid price to put God first (Heb 11:24-26)

            Result - friendship with God and revelation of his ways.

            Ways - methods, motives, desires of his heart.

·         Friendship with God grows out of respect for Him that results in heart obedience in him and giving them first place in affection.


Prov. 22:11  - He that loves purity of heart and has grace on lips - the kings shall be his friend.






















·         Do not attempt to answer all the questions.


1.    Friendship

·         How would you describe the difference between an acquaintance and a friend?

·         What qualities would you look for in a friend?

·         What failure would most commonly injure a friendship?

·         Have you ever been betrayed in a relationship by a friend?

·         What did you experience?  How did you handle it?

·         What makes that betrayal of Jesus in Mt. 26:47-50 by Judas so serious?


2.    Friendship Developed

·         Read Jn. 15:14-15

·         What conditions does Jesus require of those who are friends to Him?

·         Why does Jesus require a spirit of obedience in people?

·         What difference does Jesus make between a servant and a friend?

·         What condition must he have seen in their lives that caused him to elevate their relationship from servants to friends?

·         Comment on the statement: “The goal of discipleship is friendship”

·         Parents are the primary agents responsible for discipling their children.  There is a progression in development.


Stage:                          child                 -           youth   -           adult

Development: Obedience/Repect      -  Responsibility/Faithfulness  -  Friendship


·         Why is it so important that children learn obedience and respect?

·         Why is it so important that teens learn to assume responsibility and to be faithful (reliable) in fulfilling them?

·         How does failure at either of these stages affect the relationship with the parent?

·         Read the Great Commission in - Mtt. 28:18 - 20

·         When people are trained to obey Christ what does this qualify them to become?

·         Why is obedience the first most crucial lesson a New Christian must learn?


3.    Abraham’s Friendship with God


·         Read Ja. 2:20-24

·         What would you consider your most loved possession?  How readily could you let it go?

·         Why is it so important that our faith (trust) in God be accompanied by actions?

·         What minor struggles must Abraham have faced in letting go the only son he loved and had waited so long for?

·         His willingness to obey was evidence of what quality? (v 22)

·         What quality did Abraham have in his relationship with God apart from his faith? (Gen. 22:12)

·         What does it mean to ‘fear God’?

·         Why did God call Abraham his friend?  (Ja. 2:23)

·         Abraham’s nephew Lot once walked with him but later separated from him and lived in the city of Sodom where his life and values were corrupted.




Read Ja. 4:4

·         What does it mean to be a ‘friend of the world’ practically?’

·         How does this affect a persons relationship with God?

·         Why does God call such a person an adulterer?

·         Do you know people who once walked close to God but have now compromised and become a ‘friend of the world’?

·         What is their condition before God?

·         What is the heart of God in this matter?  Gal. 6:1; Ja. 5:19,20

·         Are their any areas of your life that are compromising your relationship with God?  What are your going to do?

·         How would you rate yourself in the two areas God requires as foundations for friendships with Him?


1.    Obedience

2.    Faithful service